just a flesh wound

I left the world of  Facebook (inc.) a week ago. It was something I’d been thinking about for some time and the more I thought, the more urgent it felt. I didn’t trust it anymore, too many companies in charge of my data. Too many changes and far too much information made public.

It’s a choice. I weighed up the pros and cons. I loved being in touch so conveniently. But I also felt I’d become lazy. I took this for granted, the touch of a button. No effort really.

I’d become more cautious with putting my art on show there. I sold quite a few paintings through it, sent to Alice Springs, Brisbane, Sunshine Coast, Auckland and Los Angeles, two commissions and now one final request upon leaving. It was a neat way to casually promote, sell and get feedback. But copyright is basically void.  And I never want to bombard my friends with my advertising because I myself loathe advertising  in most forms.

I had a disturbing experience late last year of meeting someone at an art exhibition and connecting later that week on facebook. I thought his art was very cool and we spoke about possibly collaborating this year for a combined exhibition.  I learned, soon after (Thank God I was made privy to this info as soon as it happened!!! ), that he had been arrested and charged with possession of child porn and attempting to set up a date with an underage girl….. so I unfriended, blocked him and unliked his artist page. Hence I decided never to post photos of my kids and then very few photos of myself. Kids have their right to privacy too and most of the time have no say in what their family shares of them online. It freaked the crap out of me. I have since edited this blog on the same terms.

I made the effort to write to each of my friends personally, say goodbye and share contact details. I deleted everything I could and I deleted each person individually as I ticked names off the list. It took about 4 days to make it happen. I wanted to do it properly. Most people wrote me an email or text message straight away saying thank you for the personal touch and sharing with me their other contact details.  So many of them said they were thinking of quitting too. This I found most interesting. I wondered if my action would inspire anyone else to do the same.

On the fourth day I was becoming so tired of the process, it was time-consuming but I was determined to make the effort and wipe it as clean as possible.  I felt excited about being free of it. At about 12.07am I finally filled out the delete account form and clicked the submit button… and wala! …. no more.  I went to bed with a jittery brain, dreams filled with boxes and faces…. then the following night I had similar dreams, it felt as if my brain was really defragging and rebooting after deleting a large file.

Far out it feels good!

I like to experiment, put myself to the test, it keeps life interesting. But I work with a positive purpose.  I like to observe the changes, analyse and stay curious about my reactions, habits, expectations and lessons. I f I feel myself becoming complacent then it’s time for a wake up call.

I had a long hard look at myself .  I have strong values about justice, truth and awareness. The result of my personal exploration was that ultimately I was compromising my true beliefs by staying connected to this mainstream media. Sharing is good, knowledge is power. But that gut feeling was warning me that it wasn’t really all as peachy as it seemed.

I thought about what I’d do if I was still as proactive and angry and political as I was when I was in my late teens. And I thought that if I really still had those same passionate beliefs I had then I was just a hypocrite if I  failed to stand up for them now.  True punk revolts against the system, not likes and shares and lols…. clicking away…. There is true power is sharing knowledge, that’s for sure. I want to reconnect on so many levels with my oldschool fundamentals.

I have a brain.. which I use on a regular basis.. hehe… and I have the freedom of choice, a right I hold dear to my heart. I happily unpicked my face from the ass of the facebook centipede. The fresh air is sweet. I have no intention of going back.